13 ways you know you’re a seasoned traveller

Whether you’re the one getting 10/10 on the geography round at your local pub's quiz night, or you’re that person whose school-bag-sized backpack can be ready to go in five minutes flat, wherever you are you exude the unmistakable air of a seasoned traveller.

Not sure if that's you? Here are the 13 ways you know you’ve been around the world a few times.

1. Language presents no barrier to communication

One of the greatest takeaways from your extensive travelling is the ability to say “hello”, “thank you”, and “more beer please” in at least ten different languages. When push comes to shove, you’re pretty sure you can argue football/politics/global economics in at least two of them, and recognise Dutch courage to be your most invaluable linguistic tool.

2. You've still got the cash – and the exchange rate

Even months after returning home from your latest trip, your wallet is still bulging with at least five different currencies, despite your best attempts at shifting shrapnel at the airport.

When abroad and without internet access, you become a replacement conversion app for other travellers thanks to your capacity to reel off rates between any currency and euros, dollars, or pounds.

3. You’re an indispensable member of your local quiz team

Your brain is a sponge of random travel facts: you know which country holds the annual Kanamara Matsuri (aka the Penis Festival), where it’s possible to withdraw money from an ATM in Latin, and can correctly identify the Vanuatu flag.

In the Geography round, your expertise is legendary: you'd probably have a fair go at the difficult task of assigning names to Middle Eastern countries or US states with just their outlines as clues. You’ve been to most of these places; how hard can it be?

4. You could give flight attendants a lesson in packing

Your mixture of travel cubes, compression bags, and the fact you travel so lightly that your bag often passes as hand luggage, means your packing routine is an expertly practised five minutes.

Despite a little smugness, you can’t but help feeling sympathy for the backpackers trying to shoulder their overloaded, 60 litre rucksacks.

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5. Travel hacking? You invented it

With travel constantly on the brain, you’ve got alerts set on all flight comparison websites, getting you first dibs on flights – and the cheapest prices. As an avid collector of air miles, you baulk at the idea of paying anywhere near full price when you fly. There isn’t a travel hack you’re not using.

6. Accommodation? You’ve got friends for that

Thanks to the friends you’ve amassed across the globe, you know you’ve got a sofa and a local guide for almost any destination you might want to visit. With this in mind, you plan your trips depending on who’ll have the best weather at that time of the year.

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7. You’ll sleep anywhere

Enviable throughout the travelling community, your ability to catch 40 winks regardless of where you are has been a lifesaver on many occasions. You'll sleep soundly despite the downstairs bar pumping techno music at all hours into your hostel room, and even manage a kip on an airport floor if needs must.

8. You hardly worry about long-distance over-landing nowadays

Fifteen-hour, no, 32 hour bus journeys are not the soul-destroying trials they once were. You’re now almost fond of the eardrum-piercing screams of the horror films they insist upon showing for entire bus journeys in parts of Southeast Asia and Latin America.

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9. Your house is littered with travel paraphernalia

There’s barely enough room for your housemate/partner/children/dog to move without dislodging a hand-crafted souvenir from your wall or knocking one of your paintings to the floor. Your house has taken on a striking resemblance to a junk shop or colourful jumble sale. Despite this, you could never be parted from any one of your treasured travel souvenirs.

10. Your phone is set to multiple time zones

Having added a clock for every country you visited on your last trip to your phone, you can easily stay in touch with new friends scattered across the globe. However, when you accidentally swipe to another time zone, it can still take a few seconds to remember where you actually are.

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11. Dangerous animals? Whatever do you mean?

You’ve unknowingly shared a room with a boa constrictor in Guatemala, been chased by angry monkeys up a mountain in China, and had to evacuate from the hostel swimming pool in Australia because a funnel-web spider was taking a dip. Now, nothing scares you.

12. You’re acutely aware of dining etiquette across the world…

You’re a seasoned user of chopsticks, know where you should be slurping your soup noisily to evidence your enjoyment of the meal, and in which counties it’s an insult to clear your plate. With lessons learned through trial and error, you now feel comfortable in any restaurant you visit when travelling or at home.

13. ...and even the weirdest food doesn’t bother you

Having dined in all corners of the globe (including ill-advised encounters with suspect street food) you'll try anything. As far as you’re concerned, the stranger the better: you’d eat fried tarantulas in Cambodia and escamoles (larvae from the blue agave root) in Mexico, all washed down with snake wine in Southeast Asia, and probably wouldn’t bat an eyelid.

Compare flights, find tours, book hostels and hotels for your trip, and don’t forget to buy travel insurance before you go. Header image Pixabay / CC0.